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Blog on the Tyne is dedicated to bring Toon fans everywhere the most up to date NUFC views, opinions and comment.

The author Lee Ryder, proudly born and bred on Tyneside, has followed the fortunes of the club over the last three decades as a Toon fan and football writer.

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It's the wooden spoon for the Toon

Posted by Lee on August 3, 2008 10:59 PM | 

NEWCASTLE UNITED picked up the wooden spoon here in Palma tonight after going 1-0 down to Real Mallorca.

A disjointed performance ended any hopes of pre-season silverware although the defeat against Hertha Berlin on Friday had given them a mountain to climb.

Mario's goal on six minutes sealed a 1-0 win for the hosts.

United started with David Edgar at right-back while Sebastien Bassong partnered Steven Taylor in the heart of the defence against hosts of the Mallorca Summer Cup, Real Mallorca.

The game kicked off amidst hot and sticky conditions at 10pm local time.

Injured Shola Ameobi tweaked his hamstring on Friday against Hertha Berlin meaning Alan Smith started the game in attack as the lone striker.

With Mike Ashley opting to sit the game out, Toon fans chanted "Ashley stayed at home to watch it on the telly" but that was always the plan with the Toon tycoon taking in Friday's game with executive director Dennis Wise.

United had lost 1-0 to Hertha Berlin on Friday and they went down to an early goal again tonight.

A free-kick from the left handed Real Mallorca star Mario a free header with the player finishing from close range.

Newcastle forced a corner on 20 minutes and their lack of adventure was evident when the Geordies behind the goal celebrated a flag kick as if Newcastle had equalised but it came to nothing.

On 33 minutes though the fans from Tyneside finally got to see a shot when Damien Duff cracked one powerfully but it went well wide - United didn't look like they could trouble home keeper Miguel Angel Moya.

But after a Milner corner Bassong rose high to plant a downward header which bounced to safety.

In the second half a United went forward on two minutes through Duff but his cross went begging.

Just before the hour Jesmond-educated Fraser Forster replaced Harper as KK gave his teenage stopper a run out.

But mid-way through the second period United hadn't really threatened the Mallorca goal.

Keegan then threw England Under-17 Ryan Donaldson his big chance 20 minutes from the end.

It was Real Mallorca who looked most likely to score though and a free-kick from Valero skimmed the top of the bar with 15 minutes to go.

Newcastle had a half chance when Edgar made an overlapping run down the right to cross for Smith but he failed to connect at the front post.

The first game of the night proved to somewhat of an entertaining affair but it was played in front of a small crowd and made United's mountain even higher to climb as Hannover ended the point per goal-three points per win competition with eight points.

Claims from the organisers that big crowds would take in the competition did materialise.

Yet United were backed again by the vocal Toon Army.

Hannover took the lead on 19 minutes when Jan Schlaudruff who scored with a great chip over Hertha keeper Christofer Gang.

Mike Hanke made it 2-0 on the stroke of half-time after a close range finish from a right wing cross.

Five minutes into the second half as Mark Stein forced the ball home after Robert Enke fumbled a long range shot to the Berliners back in the game.

The third goal for Hannover though arrived on the hour when Schlaudruff converted a right wing cross.

The Hannover-Hertha game finished in chaos as a floodlight failure left Toon fans singing in the dark as Newcastle arrived on to the pitch for their pre-match warm up.

UNITED: Harper (Forster 57), Taylor, Bassong, Cacapa, Enrique, Geremi, Guthrie (Donaldson 70), Edgar, Duff, Smith, Milner

MALLORCA: Moya, Ramis, Josemi, Varela, (Castro 53) Valero (Diaz 82), Otchiko (Webo), Nunes, Suarez (Marti 46), Arango (Victor 87), Trejo (Jurado 70), Corrales.

Ref: Angel Rodriguez

Comments (21)

DAN wrote...

TOTAL GARBAGE
MILNER,EDGAR,GEREMI,SMITH = CACKKKK

Posted by: DAN  | August 3, 2008 11:19 PM

Charles wrote...

Again its really unfair to blame so many players on one loss. Personally, I never got the time to watch the game live but I've still managed to catch a small glimpse.

On my assesement, we should have won at least by three goals ahd they gone in. The midfield was massively dissapointing, as was the lone striker. The entire team, in fact, showed why we need that 50M war chest.

Smith showed absolute garbage again, as usual. In the recent games, I have critize him so much I won't even bother to say what he did wrong.

Geremi's freekicks is like playing golf with a football boot. Sometimes it bangs against the wall, or it just go far wide back. Cannot stand his corners and freekicks anymore, making nonsense out of hard work.

Heard that another takeover is imminent. To be frank, if he is ready to splash as much as Roman in Chelsea, then go ahead and buy it off that miser Ashley. I don't care if he'd paid the debts and suffered Big Sam's horrific visions, the point is I don't want to see Newcastle dying because of one stinky flap jack who refuse to pay wages, then refuse to sign great players, then use young players as an investment plan to be sold later.

Posted by: Charles  | August 4, 2008 3:04 AM

Bert Adkins wrote...

We still basically have a midfield full of one paced plodders. We need to do some wheeling and dealing quick sharpish to get some pace in the team.

ALso Alan Smith needs to look at some DVDs of himself during his Leeds days to see if he can find out why his game has gone down the pan. He is so inept these days, it is unreal!

Posted by: Bert Adkins  | August 4, 2008 12:10 PM

oliver newton wrote...

I went down to the pub on my own to watch that!!!!! waste of my evening!!
Did i miss somthing or is that 3 shots on goal in 2 games????
I missed one going to the loo!!

Posted by: oliver newton  | August 4, 2008 12:14 PM

Deaco wrote...

This was very lacklustre. Alan Smith, as I understand, is one of our highly paid players, yesterday he was hopeless. The guy has not scored in 52 games and not only that, he hasn't looked like scoring either! Whilst he still has a name from his Leeds days it may be an idea to cash in on a former reputation because we certainly can't cash in on his form.
This is worrying stuff and whilst I don't want to be a scaremongerer, it comes back to a lack of signings!! We needed 5-6 players according to KK. We then sold 4-5 now KK is banking on another two. Not enough and Ashley can't "enjoy" football when we lose and have to play kids because the squad isn't big enough. Ashley - get the chequebook out or let someone else do the ownership toy!

Posted by: Deaco  | August 4, 2008 12:21 PM

Revo wrote...

The last time I wrote on here I predicted Ashley was prepared to sell up
After last nights performance I hope he does because massive surgery is required and I dont think he has the stomach for it....££££££££s needed
I wish I hadnt renewed my ticket because we are sure to be served up the same poor players...Geremi 1 in 10 decent deadballs no quality geremi...james 10 step overs no end product milner...Damien no fitness / stamina duff...Alan cant keep / give the ball away smith...Nicky run off the back of me im finished at this level Butt...Joey I will sicken the squad when I come back Barton... shola on the sick again ameobi and im sick of hearing kevin nice guy keegan hose up their backs in the paper.
Turned off the match at halftime and watched dirty sancez instead
We are a joke advertising season tickets on the radio because the toon has woken up.
Please Mr Ashley wake up yourself you are not lovin it and you can make a few bob and do us a favour at least you got freddy out of the way....toon massala please with a poppudum

Posted by: Revo  | August 4, 2008 12:24 PM

Simon wrote...

I fell asleep twice, it was abysmal.

We need to get some players back/bought or we are gonna look foolish at the start of the season. We seriously lacked anyone with an ounce of creativity and of course strikers. We will hopefully get strikers back from the injury table but there is a lack of creativity in centre mid.

I don't like to say it but 4 games in to the new season and we could already be in trouble. I hope I'm not right.

Posted by: Simon  | August 4, 2008 1:04 PM

Potski wrote...

What an absolutely toothless display from Newcastle - Smith was truly awful, please Kevin, get rid of this talentless leech!

Posted by: Potski  | August 4, 2008 1:06 PM

Ben wrote...

Well I Hope things do improve because what I have seen in the last 3 pre season games have been hugely frustrating and worryingly I cant remeber us actually creating a chance in any of the 3 matches?
We can point to the absence of VIduka, Martins and Owen but all 3 are hugely injury prone so you wonder how many games they will play over the season and I think the main problem lies in the middle of the park anyway.
Our squad is that short of numbers and quality and that was proven by the fact we had to play Cacapa in the holding role last night! What a joke!!! I have noticed Lee u havnt criticised Ashley at all on here but I am sorry the buck stops firmly with him!! even if we do sign coloccini who I do think will be a quality signing that will only leave our total outlay at about 12 mil after letting players go, well thats hardly what Ahley had been promising when he took charge, and HE nobody else stated that the club would spend when KK took over and that the club was his "HOBBY" and he would invest. Well I would love to no were the investment had gone and before people point out that he had cleared the debt that he suddenly just found when he took over , u cant tell me after looking through the books before he bought it that 100mil suddenly just popped up, and he also stated afterwards he would have still bought the club even if he new about that anyway.? and its surely clear 4 everybody 2 see that he will happily let the club go as soon as he looks like he will make a decent profit. You can tell by listening to KK that Ashley and his London friends have seemed to have even drained KK`s enthuisiasm away, and to think he went to school on KK becase he stated we had no chance of the top 4 during his contract, he obviously didn`t like KK telling the truth and prefered him to try to help him keep up the smoke screen he has created since ho took control!!

Posted by: Ben  | August 4, 2008 1:12 PM

iain wrote...

i came to the conclusion last night that the huge problems afflicting our first team sqaud are exactly the same ones that did for allardyce and caused keegan so much trouble once he arrived.

as dan says above a small group of players are dragging down the few quality ones we have so badly you havet o question whether those playuers could compete in a championship side.

in milner and duff we have ONE complete winger... milner can beat his man but cant cross and duff cant beat his man but can cross. geremi is the master of wasting set pieces and why does he need 5 touches if hes only ever going to pass it backwards ? edgar isnt pl class, maybe as a back up ch but bassong looks better than taylor so how he would edgar ever get a game god knows (also isnt it amazing how an upbringing abroad teaches players how to play football properly, geremi et all, guthrie excluded looked terrified that a ch would even dare pass them the ball instead of hoofing over there heads).

smith has become a parody of a a bad footballer, its not even funny, its depressing watching a player loose possesion time after time then his sole goal being to hack down the player he lost the ball too.


my hope(or dream) for the start of the season is that we get rid of... cacapa/geremi/smith/duff/ameobi

and replace them with a group of cheap young lads like guthrie and bassong. not to mention adding the two new full backs we need. maybe even cash in on milner as a fail to see how he will imrpove our first 11.


Posted by: iain  | August 4, 2008 1:47 PM

Sol Kelly wrote...

This "team" we have at the mo is not fit for the Premier League.... I honestly think we have a long season... I really do worry for NUFC... They need creativity, and quick.... Im sorry, but Mike Ashley has bought a club and is given nowt to KK.... how do we establish ourselves as a force to be reckoned with if our "owner" won't even put his hand in his pocket... I've been a Toon fan all my life and in all honesty i'm becoming very bored at watching NUFC at late... We are boring... Sorry, it's just the way i feel....

Posted by: Sol Kelly  | August 4, 2008 4:29 PM

Bertie English wrote...

Lee... a slight change of topic with regards to season ticket sales.
Have a look of the map of the stadium and the tickets available for the Bolton match.
Methinks Newcastle will be lucky to pull in 35,000 if this is the state of things.

http://www.nufc.talent-sport.co.uk/PagesPublic/ProductBrowse/standAndAreaSelection.aspx?stadium=NS&product=BWH09L&campaign=%20%20&type=H

Posted by: Bertie English  | August 4, 2008 4:42 PM

alex wrote...

Lee, i didnt see the game but by the sound of your report and the comments made, it must have been a blessing that I didn't!

This must be close to our worst pre-season for the past decade or even of all time. Three consecutive defeats WITHOUT scoring is an embarassment.

I have a ticket for the PSV game but by the sounds of it, the only player i will recognise upfront will be smith due to our injury list.

Is there any point of me going???


Alex

Posted by: alex  | August 4, 2008 5:16 PM

The Fonz wrote...

Im afraid i only managed to watch the first 17mins of the game last night. I just couldnt bear to watch anymore. They were pathetic, all i kept thinking was we cant take this team into the league we'll get destroyed.

If you look up alan smith in the dictionary it says 'entity with no footballing talent'. He gave the ball away all the time, same in the last game aswell. The guy is robbing us of 60k or whatever a week that could be paid to someone that scores in a season.

Our midfield is a joke, the lack of a playmaker highlighted in this tournament with balls flying everywhere trying to get them to the 'strikers'.
How can ashley claim he is excited for next season? Is it because his cash cow is nearly here cos it certainly wont be through the football.
It is the geordie faithful that attracted MA in the first place, a 1 team city that has a huge local fanbase means lots of income for the owner. If ma found the last few games exciting then hes mad, insane infact! needs his head looking at.
If the team struggle just watch the usual players feign injury so as to avoid the blame.
I hope guthrie isnt our new playmaker or we are doomed. No news on owens contract....still.
Getting kids in is ok IF they actually turn into good players in the future but its the present team thats worrying.
id rather have a scarecrow upfront than smith or ameba - itd certainly run faster.
Ive been very critical of the squad and owner but after the frustrating close season and lack of decent players after being promised I just had to get it off my chest.

Posted by: The Fonz  | August 4, 2008 7:50 PM

Ben McKinno wrote...

Hate to say it but I agree with SOl Kelly, every word.
The team we have at the moment is woeful, short in every department of both quality and quantity.
I hear players, coaches and KK saying every day that we may have a smal squad but it is full of quality players and they all have a good team spirit. Sorry Kev but we know what team spirit is, we saw it the first time you were here and when sir Bobby was in charge. As for quality!
Quality players can play with anyone, they can adapt to different tactics and opponents and they can create chances.
We do have people good enough to put them away but what are the chances that we will see them for a full pre-season, let alone a full 42 game campaign? Nil.

It's getting to the point where I am throughly concerned about the toon's chances of survival this year. Coloccini is a good start, but we need at least four other internationally established players to add quality and momentum. None of us want to see large sums wasted the way it was on Viana, Luque etc, but there are quality players avaiable - ones that we should be chasing. I half admire the new regimes ignorance of older players who will want big wages, but shunning them completely seems to be cutting off our nose to spite our own faces. A blend would be nice.
Please, please, please Mr Ashley get your cheque book out and show us you all care. You won't be enjoying your 'toy' when we're struggling to get out of the championship. KK knows the way we want to see the toon play, get in a young up and coming goalscorer (Huntelaar etc - he's already got a taste for scoring against the mackams), a truly creative midfielder and someone like Jimmy Bullard to give the midfield a bit of life, energy and personality. When good players are heading to s*nderland, fulham and wigan and we are nowhere to be seen it's time to be worried. I am very worried.

Posted by: Ben McKinno  | August 4, 2008 8:12 PM

Revo wrote...

After I posted earlier I felt a bit guilty about my thoughts and wondered if I was wrong and my post would be savaged.
It appears many of us are on the same hymn sheet after all.
I really regret renewing my seat. aaarrrgghh.

Posted by: Revo  | August 4, 2008 9:55 PM

Alan Davison wrote...

Here are my reasons why I think we are in for a long hard season!
Neither Given nor Harper instill any confidence in the defence, they create confussion with their reluctance to come of the line.
Enrique/Taylor(Chocolate)and Cacapa are not consistant enough.
Butt/Geremi and Guthrie are all one trick ponies, none of them possess the guile or craft to unlock a defence.
Milner and Duff consistantly flatter to deceive,give Duff a free and sell Milner.
Smith and Ameobi are not worthy of a comment.
This all adds up to a worrying season ahead.
Mike Ashley is now showing his true colours, he has no intention of investing in world class players and seems more content in pimping the club around the world in order to make a quick few million.

Posted by: Alan Davison  | August 4, 2008 10:07 PM

bonnielad wrote...

what a preparation for the new season.signed a couple of kids a spiderman and the usual centre forward problem smith playing..viduka injured owen injured,barton under the same cloud,another rumour of ashley selling the club.it certainly has the smell of a sale maybe the best thing to sell.2 weeks to go against the best team in the country away from home,KK must be spewing and having 2nd thoughts as it appears he has no say in the ins or outs.a long season coming lucky if we can make the top dozen or so....

Posted by: bonnielad  | August 4, 2008 11:22 PM

dire straits wrote...

We should offer Everton 15 million quid for Tim Cahill, he's the type of player we desperately need

Posted by: dire straits  | August 5, 2008 2:27 AM

DAVE ROBSON wrote...

IT'S TIME FOR A REALITY CHECK WE ARE IN SERIOUS TROUBLE, THERE IS JUST NO WAY OWEN IS GOING TO GO THRU THE SEASON WITH NO INJURIES, VIDUKA SAY NO MORE, OWEN WILL NOT SIGN ANOTHER CONTRACT UNDER THE ASHLEY REGIME GUARANTEED, DEFENCE IS SHOCKING, MIDFIELD IS JUST GONNA GET OVER RUN, OVERPOWERED THERE IS NO GUILE OR IMAGINATION IN THE MIDFIELD AT ALL, I DON,T BLAME KEV ONE IOTA , HE HAS WELL AND TRUELY BEEN SOLD DOWN THE RIVER BIG TIME AND WOULD NOT BLAME HIM IF HE WALKS, IT,S ABOUT TIME THE TOONARMY VOTED WITH THERE FEET BIGTIME , THE TOON WILL BE HERE LONG AFTER ASHLEY HAS DECIDED TO FACE UPTO THINGS, SICK OF HEREING ABOUT HOW HE FOUND ABOUT THE BIG BEBT AFTER HE BOUGHT CLUB , BIGGEST LOAD OF BULL TO COME OUT DURING HIS REIGN.
NOW IT COMES OUT HE IS SAYING IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO COMPETE WITH THE TOP 4 , DID,NT KEV SAY THIS AT ONE TIME.
WISE UP ASHLEY GET RID OF WISE AND HIS CHRONIES LEAVE THE FOOTBALL SIDE OF THINGS TO KEV, OR FACE THE CONCEQUENCES OF CHAMPIONSHIP FOOTBALL.
I HAVE SAID BEFORE I THINK WISE WILL BE IN CHARGE UNDER ASHLEYS REIGN.

Posted by: DAVE ROBSON  | August 5, 2008 10:08 AM

jacko wrote...

I really want to argue against the negativity being written, however I find it impossible to do so!

Having seen all of the pre season games I am at a loss to understand why KK is so optimistic? There just does not appear to be ANY spark to the squad at all. The best quality players are on the training staff; and could still do better that those on the playing staff! The RVI will see more of Viduka, Owen and Ameobi than the SJP faithfull and Mr Smith will no doubt continue to take his 50k+ a week without losing a seconds sleep.

Mr Ashley please stop messing around. Put your money where your imagination currently is or let the Toon go to someone who can bankroll a decent squad.

Otherwise the forthcoming season will be worse than the last. I can't bear another 9 months of that!

Posted by: jacko  | August 5, 2008 12:05 PM

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